First off, these are personal suggestions that have worked for me. But honestly none of these will help you if your significant other is not motivated to make it work. A relationship is a two-way street and these tips operate on that premise. 👏
- Make lots of plans together. Future plans, way-way-out-in-the-future plans, virtual plans, travel plans, holiday plans, hypothetical plans. Basically just plan stuff together. Give each other a thread to hold on to.
- It takes a lot of work to keep each other informed. Your weekend plans, what’s going on in your town, their city, their job stuff or your job drama, what you had for lunch, what your plans are for dinner, etc. It can quickly drain you. Especially in the beginning of it all. I try to do all my informing verbally, and reserver texting for changes to the plan or spur of the moment plans. This keeps the line of communication less congested with back-and-forth texting which can really take it out of you.
- Social inclusion is pretty much physically impossible. Digital inclusion, on the other hand is possible. If you made plans to go out on a Friday night, while your SO decided to stay in — keep you phone nearby and keep an open line of communication via texting. Nobody likes feeling left out.
- Digital dates can be fun too. Between apps like Skype, Rabbit and FaceTime couples can get food together, talk over some coffee, or Netflix together again!
- Surprise each other! Realistically, surprise flights take lots of time, planning and can cost a boat-load. Apps like Amazon, UrbanStems, and UberEats offer a cheaper alternative to the surprise visit.
- Writing to each other is fun, but mailing things is even better. I also highly recommend not sending each other things over USPS. UPS or FedEx only. I’ve had nothing but terrible experience with the US Postal Service. Use them as a last resort.
- Pick up a new hobby. People like to make things. It’s good for the soul I think. I chose videography. I spend an enormous amount of time making things for the web. So I chose a hobby that sits just outside of that realm and decided to start a YouTube channel. Hobbies keep us busy, preoccupied, and challenge the brain, and your partner will be proud no matter what you create or pickup as a hobby.
- Cook more. Depression and sadness can creep in at any moment during a long-distance relationship. Mitigate that by eating better and exploring new food groups!
- Doing new things can be really exhausting, but since you’ve both transitioned into a long-distance relationship, it means you’re both willing to explore something new. Each of you should try out new things, meet new people, and make sure to share that experience with your SO. Sharing the experience will help eachother grow closer over storytelling. This will give each of you something to talk about on the late night phone calls.
- Lastly, go run. Running gets your heartrate up, great for your heart, it’s cathartic, and can improve your mood. If you start feeling down, and miss each other badly, nothing will get your mind off of things like a brisk run. I find it to be very meditative to go run and clear my mind after a long day at the office.